I’m The Happiest On Stage.. | My 2nd Time Public Speaking!
I know I make a big deal out of everything... but this one, this one is REALLY A BIG DEAL!!!
By now, I have had facilitated over 100 women in creating their own vision boards and what a privilege! I didn’t actually realize how big of a deal it was until I was there that morning at my favorite hotel, about to help my girls over at Inspire Her Society set up for our first Women’s Retreat. To say that the whole event had been a success would be an understatement. It was a day filled with inspiration, breakthroughs, the kind of networking that goes beyond exchanging cards, good food, and laughter.
The first speaker, Nadine, did a lot of activities where the girls had to group themselves and interact with other people. She told me mid-session, “yeah, they need each other more than they need anyone who could be on stage.” and that was one of the most beautiful reminders Ive heard all day and I kept that in mind for my session later that day.
I wore my blue rompers and got lots of compliments! I loved it so much and it helped a lot because I could focus on other things and not worrying about what Im wearing. Haha! Before it was my speaking time, I snuck out to a quiet corridor where I did my jumping. Just like Tony Robbins bounces around before getting on stage! I kept reminding myself that our bodies react the same way to nervousness and excitement so the whole time I’m jumping, I’ve convinced myself I was excited! And girl, did it make all the difference! Yes, I was shaking, but at the same time I was laughing out loud and asking everybody to jump with me. Haha!
The first thing I said on stage? “Hiiii!” Just like every professional speaker would open up their speech, right? Haha! I told myself that that experience would be different and so much better than I did the first time I was on stage. And it was.
It was the easiest thing I’ve ever done and quite frankly, the best few minutes of my life. Don’t know how long I was standing on that stage but you know what? It felt home. Like, I was meant to be there. I wanted to be there. I thought maybe this is what I was made for and I believed it. Having “speaker” under my name on that tag meant the whole world.
The room felt so different. The girls made me feel much safer. They didn’t look up to me and quite frankly, I didn’t need them to. There was no pressure. Like, I was there showing them pictures of my family, my nerdy books, photos from a coffee shop, my friends and everything else that has manifested from my vision board. It was as though we were just hanging out and I was telling magical stories to friends.
I was a bit conscious of myself until I saw a girl throw her head back in laughter after I said something silly. After that, nothing else mattered. I was on a roll having the time of my life just winging it— throwing the worst kind of dad jokes and excited outbursts, word slips, squealing and all.
The overall speaking on stage thing was a lot less nerve wracking than the first one and I concluded there have been a few factors.
One. Maybe it was because I didn’t make a big deal out of it! I literally was CHILLING the weeks and DAYS prior to it. I mean, I only created my powerpoint the night before. (NOT recommended and I’ll ever do it again ahahahha but YEAH!) I even had to make a few changes right before I spoke. Another, maybe because my parents weren’t there. As much as I would have loved them seeing me, I was so glad no one was babying me! Sometimes, I really think I do better when my mom’s not around because when she is, gosh, suddenly I can’t stand on my feet IM SUCH A BABY. Maybe another thing is the fact that they have been warmed up by other speakers and had LUNCH before my session. IM SO LUCKY.
Now I look back, connecting the dots to what led me here. And the butterfly effect just keeps on surprising me. Like, what if I didn’t find The Secret on the top shelf of that library? What if I didn’t go to that library that day? What if I didn’t make my first vision board? What if i didn’t tell anyone about it? What if I hadn’t sent that email? What if I was too afraid to come up to Tamreen and ask if they needed a volunteer? What if Kat didn’t ask me if I wanted to go? What if what if what if? And after all that, I was grateful for every single thing, every decision, every “yes”, every “frick it” that have brought me to that magical moment.
There I was, on stage, at my favorite hotel to go to when I wanna feel fancy schamncy, talking about my life, sharing a picture of my family. Pictures of my dreams. Pictures of coffeeshops and women and books. And I felt so so safe. And understood. And I knew I belong.
But my real highlight happened when I got off the stage and found soul sisters when I talked to the girls. We seemed so different on the surface but a few minutes of conversations and I was sure we were best friends in our previous lives. Im grateful to have found them in this one.
When that day ended, I went back to the hall where I did my jumping and there I listened to my worship music bawling my eyes out of so much gratitude. In my head, there were so many people-- there are so many people you could’ve chosen but You looked at me and hand picked me. I’m blessed with so much opportunities. I’m blessed to be able to share something I love. I’m blessed to have helped these girls create a vision for themselves. There’s no pressure because I know that I am only the voice, not the message. And I am only a channel of the message that the world NEEDS. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
I am so excited for these women. Showing up that day to make time for themselves and to learn with other women. For my co-speakers, it was a privilege sharing the stage with you! Also, Ive taken lots of notes AHAHHAHHA. I’m the luckiest girl. And to my Inspire Her girls, I’ve never been more proud to be part of something. I always thank the universe for somehow bringing you to me. I learn alot about life and myself whenever I’m with you and working alongside you makes me all the more want to become better— personal and professional wise. I love you. I love us. :)
Here’s the PDF version of the guide we used that day.. You may download it and create your board too! CLICK THE PHOTO BELOW!